Change

 I'm going to speak from the heart here. A lot has changed since I moved to Slovakia. When I first moved here it was really hard for me to go to Tomáš' parents' house. They invited us regularly for Sunday lunch, for example, and it was always a struggle for me. Relationships are often hard in the beginning, but add to that the in-law factor, a language barrier, different cultures and very different types of families and not a smooth transition does it make. When I first met Tomáš's family, they were all pretty apprehensive about talking to me, probably mainly because they weren't sure how to. They didn't know how much Slovak I understood, so they just preferred to talk through Tomáš or not to talk at all. Couple that with me being very shy to speak, and the result was a lot of me sitting silently, smiling, hands in lap, feeling awkward. One difference between Slovak families and American families is that typically in Slovak families the lady of the house serves all of the guests. Hand and foot. In my house when we have a meal, everyone is to serve themselves (I mean from the meal laid before them), take as much as they want, have seconds, choose what they want and don't want, get up and get more water etc. etc. In other words, make themselves at home. Some Slovaks would consider this an outrage because to them hospitality is king and that means no one lifts a finger...except the hosting woman. *I must enter a sidenote here because I can already hear some of my friends screaming. There are some Slovak families that function a little more like my American family, but even they, I would say, still slant more to the guests-don't-lift-a-finger mentality than I do. Some would say I'm a terrible hostess, but the truth is, both sides want their guests to feel welcome and good in their homes. I just think there is a difference of opinion on what makes that happen.
     But back to my rough beginnings...Not only did Tomáš' mom, let's call her Babka (I do : ), serve my meal, make my coffee and clean up after me, but she sent us home with leftovers and an abundance of whatever she had or whatever we needed. In the summer this meant: tomatoes, cucumbers, strawberries, raspberries, currants, kohlrabi, baby lettuce and many things I'm forgetting just now. In the fall: apples, plums, grapes, potatoes and walnuts. And during the cold months: pickles, jam, canned fruit, currant and raspberry syrup, lečo, čalamada and who knows what else. Paradise, right? I know. But the truth of the matter was that I felt really embarrassed by it for a long time. I just was not used to this. With time, things got better with the communication side of things. Babka, especially, started talking to me more when she realized that we could communicate quite well. I've actually probably learned more of my Slovak from her than anyone else. But then I had Lily. This amped up my aforementioned embarrassment tenfold, because she started coming to our house twice weekly to help out. Not only did she bring the food that she always sent home with us before, but now she started cooking meals and bringing those with her too. She would take Lily out for walks, fold laundry, iron and sometimes even vacuum.
     But somewhere along the line I started to accept the help gladly and just decided to be thankful. We've never asked her to do any of what she does so if she wants to do it, I'll take it as a(n enormous) blessing. And when I say things have changed, it's because the other day Lily and I went to visit Babka (by ourselves, which, in itself is also huge. This never would have happened even a year-and-a-half ago) and I started thinking about how much I now enjoy these visits. It's a chance for me to get out of the house, enjoy a beautiful garden on a quiet street, have some help watching our little livewire, but most of all just to watch Lily and her together. Our Babka is a spry little lady and she always finds something fun for Bug to do like go see the goat up the street or pick raspberries or draw with chalk on their patio or this:



Collecting fallen, inedible apples

  I love where we live, but it leaves a lot to be desired when it comes to places for kids to play. For that there is nothing better than a house with a garden, I've learned. Beauty and nature and interest and fresh air abound, and we don't have to contend with broken glass and cigarette butts and cars. Heaven.


Did I mention it's apple season?





On the way to Babka's house

 Relationships have loosened with the other family members too, which I'm very thankful for. They are all really good to us and I could blog about each of them. And I'm very thankful that Lily (and baby #2) has them too.  
Oh, and speaking of changes, here's a quick before and after of our living room chairs that I re-covered. (I would say reupholstered, but that would be giving wayyy too much credit : ) What do you think? I think it really cheers the place up. Now if Tomáš would just let me paint them...



Chair(s) formerly re-covered by me too



Chirp, chirp